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Sarah Brummitt FFIPI AICI CIP

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One of only a handful of image professionals as well qualified in her field, anywhere in the world.

Millennials, Mentoring and Making an Impact

I have been working on a fascinating project over the last few months with a global client that is looking to develop high potential millennials through a reverse mentoring initiative with the senior leadership team. My involvement has been to develop the influencing skills that will be needed for these young professionals to have real impact around the senior leadership table and here’s what I’ve noticed:

• A real concern regarding what they are/are not ‘allowed’ to say.
• A desire to please; a concern to challenge; a lack of confidence given their relatively junior position vis-a-vis their senior colleagues.
• A real passion in their role and a belief in what they – as Millennials – think, act and feel.

So where have we focused our efforts?

Speaking in public with confidence and authority, facilitating a discussion to achieve a common goal and being comfortable to be ‘put on the spot’. In a complex, fast-paced business, with more than its fair share of ambiguity, complexity and uncertainty, having impact means being able to demonstrate these skills – amongst many others. It is also essential to getting things done.

So, where to start? Well, how about considering the following:

• Managing our body language - because the majority of our communication is non–verbal and so how we sit, use our hands and look at people all has significant impact on the power of our message.
• Rehearsing key messages in advance: practising saying not just thinking about key points is vital – especially when faced with a short window to get (and keep) the attention of the audience.
• Knowing when to stop talking and structuring our messages into three parts creates a natural story and ‘finish point’.
• Supporting opinion with fact makes our viewpoint more compelling.
• Explaining the ‘why’; not just the ‘what’ (because as Simon Sinek says: ‘people don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it’).
• Being able to ‘elegantly interrupt’ someone who waffles on or takes the discussion off track are vital moderating skills.
• Saying ‘I don’t know’ confidently (rather than apologetically).
• Being willing to stand up and take responsibility for moving things forward (rather than pointing the finger at others or waiting for ‘the company’ to change).

…and that’s just a few of the topics we’ve explored. As the sessions have unfolded what is clearly apparent is that these are strategies and skills at all ages; not just for millennials. Making an impact isn’t easy; it’s about personal rather than positional power and whether we are a mentor, a millennial or simply a professional striving to do a good job, the skills of exquisite influence are ones that all of us can hone at any age.

Until next time…

Management by Walking Around

I have been working with a client for a couple of months now, helping them to drive a new sales transformation process within their business. As the well-worn Peter Drucker phrase goes: ‘culture eats strategy for breakfast’, so no matter how great the strategy, how right the market conditions and how amazing the product, all will die on the altar of a divisive, negative, under-performing culture. Changing culture in business is under-estimated. It is hard because it means dealing with the most difficult raw material that any leader has to deal with – and that’s emotion. Dealing with emotion is hard because quite simply there’s no black and white. Each situation, each individual, each change is different – and therefore so is the emotion behind it.

In a large, fast-paced sales environment where high value deals are done in two telephone calls within the space of a week, some of the standard rhythms around longer 1:1 meetings, away from the floor where the leader can coach and give feedback to their team, will not be as effective in driving cultural change – if done on their own. Everyone wants a bit of heat and a bit of light from their manager, so there has to be other means by which leaders can interact in a low effort, high impact way that can – and does – work to drive a high performance culture and I call it ‘management by walking around’. To be clear, I do not mean aimless meandering. I do mean deliberate, intentional and consistent activity to reach the sales team with the right message to demonstrate support, constructive challenge, help, appreciation and stretch. Leaders with ‘Executive Presence’ make it look easy – the rest of us need to learn the strategies.

So, specifically:

• Plan to make the activity part of your operational rhythm and stick to it.
• Don’t bring an entourage. I used to work in the pharmaceutical industry where hospital consultants conduct weekly ward rounds with a cast of thousands. My consultants were always late for our appointments (as well as their afternoon clinics, I might add). We’re not trying to emulate that. It can become a huge time drain – as well as a distraction.
• Decide if it’s a one way or a two way activity (i.e. do I just want to share something or do I want to discuss?). If it’s one way – plan the key message and be consistent; if it’s two-way, then be prepared to listen!
• Follow up – especially where you’ve committed to during the interaction. Otherwise your integrity (and your impact) will quickly fall away.
• Remember it’s not the platform for criticism – so don’t.
• Make sure (over time) that you connect with everyone – avoid favouritism; that never plays well.

Remember, leaders with Executive Presence inspire those around them with that ‘I’ll follow you anywhere’ kind of aura. Making our interactions high impact – whether they are long or short – represents an opportunity for all of us to achieve this kind of response from our people. Management by walking around is an underrated tactic and as with all the topics about which I write I could say even more. However, now I must stop, not least because it’s time for me to go walkabout.

Until next time…

Who Shows Up?

I spent time with a former colleague recently and was reminded of a film that I watched a number of years ago called ‘Polar Express’. In it was a phrase that resonated with me – the ‘mood hoover’.

Well, let’s just say my former colleague is one of those. A ‘mood hoover’ sucks the energy, will to live, positivity out of the air and casts gloom and doom wherever they are. In the presence of a mood hoover, no matter what might be going well, they will always find a way to bring the conversation down. Creativity is stifled, optimism dwindles and negativity prevails…it got me thinking.

Having ‘Executive Presence’ means having that ‘I’ll follow you anywhere’ impact on other people when you walk in a room; whether it’s the most junior or senior person in the company. Being able to inspire others, ignite their interests, talents, passion and creativity at work all sits at odds with being a ‘mood hoover’. As professionals, as leaders and as people – we are in a relationship business – no matter our industry, geography or role. I travel a lot and the vagaries of public transport mean that I am invariably delayed, distracted and demented getting to clients via trains, buses, tubes and planes. There are times when I could simply scream with pure frustration. So my point is simply this: part of how we convey presence means asking ourselves – every day – in every meeting, conference call or 1:1, who shows up? What’s our energy that we bring to each conversation or interaction? What’s our intention? What’s our mind-set? What are we communicating to the rest of the world, beyond the words which come out of our mouth? How do we ‘shake off’ the ‘mood hoover’ mentality – even when we’re emotionally over wrought and it would just feel better to let off steam?

Here are some suggestions:

• Know your triggers, and plan to create something positive from the negative. For example, I’m very productive when travelling and so get a lot of work done. It's this I choose to focus on when stuck in such situations.
• Identify what else you need to build resilience – is it more sleep, exercise, making the weekends less frenetic, doing something just for you or something else? These resources are essential to emotional well-being and stability.
• Find things that make you laugh and make time to do just that. Laughter is good for the soul and replenishes even the most frazzled traveller….
• Challenge yourself – is this your best self? Even when you feel like Michael Douglas in ‘Falling Down’, do you really think others deserve to experience this from you?

Know that your energy, purpose and intention is an essential part of Executive Presence and one that you communicate exquisitely – be it good or bad - every day to those around you. Do you have a brand – like my former colleague – of this unrelenting mood hoover? Or are you someone whose presence, purpose, intention and energy inspires and delights those around you?

As we build our impact, influence and relationships at work, always remember to ask yourself: who shows up?

Does Size Matter?

My attention is drawn this month to a fascinating piece of research conducted by Exeter University. They examined, in some detail, the weight, height and earnings of UK men and women, and it reveals some ‘awful but true’ unconscious biases.

Amongst their conclusions is the reality that men who are shorter than the national UK average (5’ 9” or 1.75 m) earn an average of £1,500 less than their colleagues. This is not the first time height and leadership have been drawn together. Malcolm Gladwell, in his excellent book ‘Blink – The Power Of Thinking Without Thinking’, revealed some fascinating research from the United States. Again, the context was implicit bias, and Gladwell compared the height of CEOs from Fortune 500 companies versus the rest of the US male population. He found that 58% of the CEOs from Fortune 500 companies, were 6 feet or taller. This is 1 metre 82 cm for our metric friends amongst us and it compared with an average across the US population of 14.5%. In addition, in general in the United States, there are 3.9% of men who are 6’ 2” and this compared with almost a third across Gladwell’s survey sample of Fortune 500 CEOs. Now, you might think: ‘who cares?’

Well, let’s step back for a moment and focus on what it means for leaders today. This is the classic ‘tall poppy syndrome’. Whatever our role at work, all of us are in the business of influence and what I am not suggesting is that men who are less than 5’ 9” wear built up heels. However, what I am suggesting is that no matter our height, weight or size, it is critical for all leaders to convey what I call ‘executive presence’. By that I mean the ability to walk into a room and own it, being able to inspire those around them, whether they are the receptionist or the CEO. If we’re easier to be seen then it’s easier to be heard, and if it’s easier to be heard then it’s easier to influence. Leaders with executive presence radiate confidence. They command attention but do not demand attention. Leaders with executive presence are authentic, project poise and authority, they have high levels of self-awareness so know when they are making an impact and also know when they are missing the mark. Such leaders continue to harness strengths whilst continuing to work on their gaps or flaws.

So, height isn’t important – but executive presence is; it’s how we engage, inspire, motivate, enthuse, harness and retain the talent around us to deliver results.

Which Communication Trap Do You Fall Into?

Have you ever been in a meeting that has caused you to lose the will to live? I have been reflecting on language and communication over the last month because recently, I have had that experience. What prompted it? Quite simply the incredibly poor calibre of communication by senior, successful professional people. And it got me pondering….Janice Obuchowski wrote an excellent article in the Harvard Business Review more than 10 years ago that still resonates today. She talked about three kinds of communication trap – namely anonymity, obscurity and tedium.

The anonymity trap is where leaders start talking the same corporate language. Words and phrases which are relatively unique to that organisation get used over and over again. I wrote in my book last year on the topic of Executive Presence: Demonstrating Leadership In Times Of Change And Uncertainty, that one of my clients uses the phrase ‘taking people on the journey’. I have many problems with this; not least of which is that I don’t understand what it really means. However, in the context of the model, the phrase is an example of the anonymity trap because everyone says it, and so no single voice ‘stands out’. In other words, everyone sounds the same.

The obscurity trap is overuse of jargon, technical language and little known words and phrases in order to sound intelligent. I recently sat in a session where a colleague used the word ‘ersatz’. Exactly, how many of you right now are looking up the meaning of the word? I guarantee almost no-one (me included) knew what they meant when they said it; and it was designed to demonstrate being clever and erudite. Except that it didn’t work. It caused confusion and irritation, not to mention discomfort when clarity was sought. (It means an inferior substitute by the way).

The tedium trap is just way too much information. This is where our communication is a tsunami of facts, figures, stories, data coming at the audience at speed. Too much; too overwhelming; too little thought gone in to our communication. The result is unfocused and often irrelevant information.

So how do we, as leaders, stop falling into one or more of these traps? Well to convey Executive Presence I would suggest:

• Don’t use standard formats or templates for presentations or pitches. Be different by structuring your message differently – especially at the beginning and the end (when attention is at its highest).
• Use metaphor and analogy – it is far more effective for conveying a message – especially when the communication is dull and/or complicated.
• Split your message into three parts to make it a narrative structure, just like a story.
• Be clear on what you want to achieve by communicating the message. Beware of ‘just updating’ people. The last thing we all need is data for the sake of having data. Unless you want a decision (for example, is it red or green? Tuesday or Thursday?); action (for example, to send a note or make a call) or commitment (time, money, people etc.) then why are you telling us?
• Be brief! Less is always more….
• Cut out the buzzword bingo nonsense.
• Be humorous (but not flippant) if this is a natural ability you possess.

Our communication is a reflection of the culture in which we live. We all have the capacity to be affected by it (for good and ill), and our challenge as leaders is to make our communication stand out for the right reasons, not blend in with everyone else for the wrong ones.

Love, Loyalty and Leadership

February is traditionally the month where at every turn, there’s talk of love. I write this post on Valentine’s Day, and by its very nature, this day, and how we celebrate it, remains a subject about which many have a fervent opinion. But what about love and leadership?

Really???? Who are we kidding??

Many of you will be familiar with the Harvard Service Profit Chain concept, which essentially suggests that businesses which thrive and grow, are businesses with customers who are engaged with the brand, who love it, who will remain loyal to it and who will recommend it to their family and friends. What drives that is an experience which leaves customers feeling that they are not only satisfied - but also connected emotionally - to that brand. In turn, what drives that is employees who are engaged with the company in which they work and who deliver an experience that their customers will love. And this is where we, as leaders, come in.

Much of my time is spent talking with leaders about the skills, strategies, tools and techniques of ‘Executive Presence’. One of the pillars of my framework is ‘engage’, and what I mean by that is leaders who have Executive Presence know how to win the hearts as well as the minds of their employees. They know how to attract, develop, challenge, support, motivate, enthuse, direct and retain great talent within their business. They know how to deal with, irrespective of the industry in which they work, the most difficult and yet most critical raw material in business there is – and that is emotion. It’s difficult because it’s not black and white. It’s critical because it’s always there.

Leadership is about delivering results through others and, therefore, it quite simply means that leadership is a relationship business. Great relationships are built on great communication. And it’s not easy to communicate effectively – especially when faced with negativity, cynicism, passive aggressive behaviour, depression, arrogance, ignorance – to name but a few. So where do we start? Well, like all great relationships, how about considering:

1. How well have we communicated our vision of where we’re going? How clear, concise and compelling have we made it? Everyone – no matter where they work or what they do – wants to know where the business is heading. A litmus test; pick five people at random and if what they say is not consistent (and not what you want), then the answer to the question is ‘not well enough’.
2. How often do we really make time to listen to our people? I’m not talking about simply through corporate structures such as employee satisfaction surveys, appraisals, etc. I’m talking about making and defending time to be with our people, to listen (without distraction!) to what they’re saying and to genuinely care.
3. How often are we focused on the right answers rather than the right questions? Our early career is necessarily built on developing technical competence – which means amassing the right level of accurate information for our area of expertise. However, there comes a point where this simply doesn’t matter. We have people in our business who know the right answers. (By the way if we don’t; we’re not hiring the right people.) The higher we rise in our career, the more important it is to understand that effective leadership is far more about asking a continual array of powerful, searching, stretching questions based on a genuine curiosity to understand.

Amongst many, many other skills and strategies, it is this that builds loyalty amongst our people; it is this that helps them to love working for the business, the team and for you, and it is this that helps us to be better leaders.

Will You Fail to Have a Great Career?

A new year, a new start and many of us turn again to the goals and aspirations of our professional lives for this year, whilst simultaneously reflecting on the successes and failures of the past 12 months. In my book, Executive Presence: Demonstrating Leadership in Times of Change and Uncertainty, I talk about the LEADER model of Executive Presence and the second ‘E’ stands for 'Evolve'. This area of leadership is focused on how we manage our career, find and pursue our passion at work.

One of the best, best, best TED talks I have watched in the last twelve months is by Larry Smith, a Professor of Economics, University of Waterloo in Canada. It’s a funny, but very blunt, talk that will make you stop and think – if you’ve not already done so given the title above. His unique delivery style is thought-provoking, funny, and devastatingly honest and it’s a video that we all should watch and re-watch. Smith states that most of us will fail to have a great career and espouses the reasons why:

1. Some of us start out with the aspiration for a good career and some of us start out with the aspiration for a great career. However, most of us will fail at both.
2. We have been told many, many times that we should pursue our passion, but choose to ignore this advice and decide not to pursue it. 
3. Some of us are simply too lazy and won’t try hard enough. If we try to look for our passion, but not find it, then we make excuses not to do what you need to do for a really great career.
4. We create excuses that we believe, such as the excuse that really great careers are truly a matter of luck for most people. 
5. We choose to believe that there are special people who pursue their passions but they are geniuses. Smith suggests that we all used to think we were geniuses – but probably only when we were young. As we grow up we lose this belief and think instead that we are ‘completely competent’. Smith believes that such thoughts damn us all with the faintest of praise. And he’s right.
6. We believe that if we pursue a great career then we have to be weird. People who pursue their passions are strange or odd. We don’t like to think of ourselves as strange or odd. We like to think of ourselves as nice, normal people. However, nice normal people don’t have passion.
7. We do what our parents tell us – and that is to work really, really hard. Smith believes that we can work really, really hard – and that’s not the same as having a really great career. He also believes that just telling kids to work really hard is nonsense. Why? Because all of the evidence points to the contrary. 
8. We find things that we’re interested in but we don’t find our passion. Smith says that having an interest is great – but what about finding our passion in the big wide world and trying a bit harder? We’re not interested. Passion isn’t the same as interest and we might have lots of interests but all of us need to find our passion.
9. Even if we find our passion many of us will still fail according to Smith. Why? Because we continue to invent excuses for not having a great career as our passion. The phrase “if only I had…” is, according to Smith, one of the most damning things we can say.
10. Smith says that what we say to ourselves is that human relationships are more important than accomplishments. We want to be a great friend, a great parent, a great spouse etc. and we won’t sacrifice that at the altar of human accomplishment. Smith is uncomfortably honest here. If we listen to what we’re saying to ourselves; we’re making ourselves out to be a hero. But we’re no heroes. 
11. Then when our children say that they want to be something other than that which they are good at, we repeat the mantra. We repeat what our parents told us and what we have told ourselves in terms of excuses. 
12. The bottom line is that many of us are simply afraid. We’re afraid to try, afraid to fail, afraid to succeed.
13. Unless……….

So, let's not prove Larry Smith right. As 2016 begins (and before it gathers speed), now is the perfect time to reflect, plan and strategise to ensure that we pursue and excel at our life's purpose in a professional context, and secure the right resources and support around us to ensure success.

What Difference does Age make to our Impact at Work?

The privilege of working with my clients is diversity. Different industries, different countries, different roles, different cultures, different products or services and different leadership styles.

In addition, I work with professional men and women who are in their first role out of university, and at the same time I work with those enjoying 40+ years at work.

So what? As 2015 draws to a close; it strikes me that my primary focus this year has been research – and I am absorbed once more by fascinating data that has been published exploring the notion of strengths and gaps of different generations at work. To remind ourselves, Baby Boomers were born before 1963, Generation X was born between 1963 and 1980 and Millennials were born between 1980 and 1995. Recently I came across a study of 1200 workers which delineated the pros and cons of different generations, and their findings are fascinating.

Baby Boomers were seen as being productive and hardworking but also seen as less adaptable and less collaborative. Generation X was seen as having more managerial skills and good at problem solving. However, they were also seen as less cost effective and as having less ‘Executive Presence’. Millennials were viewed as being enthusiastic and technically savvy, but also viewed as being lazy, unproductive and self-absorbed.

So, what’s my point?

Well, as a Generation X-er myself, I paused at the notion of being identified in a category that has less ‘Executive Presence’. The research suggests that we have more than Millennials, but not as much as Baby Boomers.

Even so, what does this all mean? My view is that whatever our age, the reality is that we need to convey confidence, authority, credibility, humility and poise at work. We need to command, but not demand attention. We need to maximise our strengths and continue to work on our gaps. We need to inspire and engage those around us and be willing to evolve and grow. Our ability to thrive and succeed at work is built on the assumption that we are technically competent. However, that alone won’t guarantee success. We need to convey authority and wisdom (harder to do when we are young), as well as humility and a willingness to continue to grow and develop (harder to do when we are older). We have to learn skills of behavioural flexibility that simply weren’t needed in the past. Positional power won’t cut it; personal power does. And that’s at any age. Remember, Executive Presence isn’t about style over substance. It’s about exquisite influence.

So, as the festive season is here, I invite you all – irrespective of the generation to which you belong – to celebrate the strengths of your age, and equally I invite you all to consider how you, no matter your age, your role, your industry, your company or your position can enhance your Executive Presence still further in 2016.

Listening Loudly

Leadership can all too easily be viewed in terms of ‘tell’. My focus this month with leaders has been around listening. Basically, we suck at it!

D.A. Benton’s book ‘When Lions Don’t Need To Roar’ suggests that leaders hear less than 30% of what is said. Let’s just stop and think about that for a moment. We hear less than one in every three words spoken. How can we be surprised when, as a muscle group, this skill set has been under assault like never before? We are always plugged in, online, connected, super available, super responsive, always on, always busy, always doing stuff, oh and by the way – juggling all of the eye-watering information with which our senses are being assaulted. And yet, we are also the most disengaged workforce at the same time. No-one’s listening and no-one cares! Well, before we become too gloomy, the best leaders with the most engaging presence listen louder. What do I mean by that? Quite simply literature categorizes how we listen in a wide variety of different ways. It can be described as combative, attentive and reflective or deep and light listening or fake and real etc. etc. You get the idea.

I talk about four levels with my clients:

1. Cosmetic listening means that we're not at all – we're in our own world, thinking about something else, someone else and some other reason to keep on breathing…….(rather than listening to you).
2. Conversational listening means that we're waiting to get into the conversation (if only you’d stop talking). When we can wait no longer, we just start talking over you.
3. Content level listening means that we’re starting to hear both content and context of what’s being said. Oh good – we're actually listening.
4. Exquisite level listening means that we're hearing not just what you said, but also what you didn’t say – in other words, what you really mean.

In terms of best practice listening, much like many things in leadership, the theory is not intellectually challenging, it’s the practical application of it that is the tough part. So, my invitation to you reading this is to pin back your ears, wind down the distractions and really listen.

The Challenge of Leading Change

During the month of September I have been spending time with leaders who have a strategy to transform their business. The commercial rationale makes sense, the timing is right and the numbers stack up. And yet – why is it that most efforts at driving change fail to deliver the expected business outcomes? Why is it so difficult to do? Peter Drucker, one of the most extensively published management gurus ever, once said “culture eats strategy for breakfast”, and herein lies the challenge for leaders everywhere. You can have the best business case in the world, the right moment in the market, the financial resources to make it happen – and still it fails because, as always, leadership is a relationship business. The ability to demonstrate leadership in times of change and uncertainty remains an acute one. So, what exactly do they have to do (other than say that they want to change the culture)?

Here are some practical verbal strategies with which to hone our ‘Executive Presence’ as a leader:

1. Ask searching, simple questions. For example, we are hardwired as humans to associate change with loss. Loss of time, loss of money, loss of status, loss of energy, loss of happiness, loss of security etc. What exactly do we think we will lose? What might be possible if we embraced the change? What support do we need? How do others help us get there? How can we focus on what’s possible (rather than what’s not)? Often these – and other such questions – need repetition - as part of the power in asking them is to allow others to process their thoughts aloud. Be patient and persist.
2. Get our stories straight. We may have seen the email, glanced at the Chairman's report or even read the pitch distributed to the whole company, but that doesn’t win hearts and minds around the business case for change. Simple, effective, conversational stories that make the point crisply, engage others easily and motivate us to remember and repeat those stories are what it’s all about. Stories are the fuel of motivation. The right kind encourage our people to engage and connect with the journey; the wrong ones….well, they do the exact opposite.
3. Find small wins and celebrate. Making time to find and communicate ‘wins’, no matter how small, are always worth the effort. In the absence of information it is all too easy to either make it up, or assume we’ve not been told. Neither is desirable when trying to create a positive energy around momentum.
4. Remember SUMO (Shut Up; Move On). Not everything will work in an environment of change; so once the point has been acknowledged then shut up and move on. Don’t keep going back to it and talking for months or even years afterwards about what didn’t work. We get it; let’s learn from it and then focus on the future. Avoid rambling incessantly on about the past.
5. Retain a sense of humour. It’s a moment of connection that is unique to humans. Every once in a while that’s a good thing. When we laugh, we love.

Sarah's new book ‘Executive Presence – Demonstrating Leadership in Times of Change and Uncertainty’ is out now.  Find this on www.amazon.co.uk.

What Leaders can learn from Tennis

At the time of writing this newsletter, the fourth and final tennis Grand Slam of the year is on – the US Open. Whilst watching the brilliance, agility, pace, flexibility and commitment of the world’s best tennis players, I am struck by how this amazing game represents a brilliant metaphor for effective conversation in business. First of all, you can’t play tennis on your own. No matter how good you are, you need others to play with you. Secondly, there’s a very strong sense of ‘taking it in turns’ when it comes to serving, hitting the ball and waiting for the return. In a good conversation, you talk for a bit, then I talk for a bit. Thirdly, adaptability is key. Neither party always knows where the ball is going to land, but our role is to get it back when faced with a difficult or challenging return. Some rallies are long; others are very short. There’s pace, variety, agility and skill in every point. Each player focuses on the other person, their strategy, where the ball is heading, what their game plan might be and so on.

In my last newsletter I introduced the concept of ‘Reading the Room’. In other words, being able to gauge what is happening, the mood and the impact of our communication on others and make the right adjustments to create impact. The premise of this concept is easy; the consistent and continual application of it is a lot more difficult. I have spent time recently with folks who don’t even know that they don’t do this well. One of the most challenging behaviours to experience is the ‘it’s all about me.com’. Every word, every conversation, every topic becomes an opportunity to talk about themselves. It’s enough to take the enamel off your teeth! Leaders who have ‘Executive Presence’ can walk in to any situation, gauge the mood, flex, adapt and ‘own’ the room naturally, easily and brilliantly. Others need to watch and learn.

But isn’t tennis also about winning? And beating the other person? Yes. But in multiple encounters everyone is beaten by others eventually, and it’s about respecting your opponent and paying very close attention to them and the development of their game. It’s also about building and practising your strengths, and continuing to work on those areas of your game that are less impactful. It’s the same with developing ‘presence’.  Leaders need to do all of this if they are to have powerful, effective, engaging conversations with their team, colleagues, customers and senior stakeholders. So, go and practise ‘Reading the Room’ today whilst I head out to work on my serve…….

Sarah has also written a new book ‘Executive Presence – Demonstrating Leadership in Times of Change and Uncertainty’.  Find this on www.amazon.co.uk.

Reading the Room

In the course of my business I have recently, personally experienced two suppliers who very much embody ‘iaam.com’ philosophy. For those of you wondering what on earth that means, it stands for ‘it’s all about me dot com’. It’s a phrase that embodies others who, in their interactions, are really only concerned about their own agenda, their own priorities, their own needs – with a woeful lack of focus or flexibility regarding the agenda of others. What was so fascinating was that they had no idea of the impact of their communication. So how good are you at reading the room? I only ask because over the course of the past month, I have been working with clients who struggle in this area. 

Let’s start with some definitions. ‘Reading the Room’ means being able to gauge the impact of your communication on your audience and make adjustments accordingly. It’s all about emotional intelligence in terms of having your radar ‘on’, and then behavioural flexibility to adjust your communication style accordingly. Leaders who have ‘Executive Presence’ are able to do this well. The place to start is by analysing how others speak and we can do this in a couple of different ways. Firstly we can pay attention to style (pace, language, intonation, key words, thought vs. feelings, says a lot vs. says a little etc.). In terms of rapport, if we don’t get this right, building an environment of trust – and the basis of a mutually beneficial relationship - is tough. A fantastic resource that I have been using to underpin my coaching with clients in this area is the book ‘Reading the Room’ by David Kantor. Assuming we’ve done this first piece of analysis correctly (no mean feat), Kantor advises that we pay attention to the content of the speech of others, using three different frames of reference. I’ll start in this blog with the first, which Kantor suggests is to listen for the type of action being spoken by each person. Is the talk of others about being a mover (making suggestions/showing initiative), opposer (disagreeing/proposing a different direction), follower (agreeing with the suggestion of others), or bystander (not committing and rather commentating or observing on what is occurring)?

Who cares? Well, you should. Leadership is a relationship business and that means being able to easily, smoothly, readily connect, engage, delight, motivate, enthuse others. Whenever we try to ‘decode’ what we do well, then it can appear complex, confusing and chaotic. The point is that this is how we learn. By understanding what we do (or what others do well) and replicating it. This isn’t easy. By the way, our ability to pay attention as leaders has never been more under threat, so on that basis, if we’re not tuned in, how can we influence effectively?

So here’s my challenge – as the summer holidays approach (a great opportunity to people watch/observe), I invite you to simply ‘read the room’. What do you notice? What do you really hear and observe that you haven’t noticed before?

Have fun and we’ll continue this conversation in September.

Evolve like a Leader

One of the most powerful facets of leaders who have presence, is that they are ‘on their purpose’. In the model of Executive Presence that I have developed called LEADER, the second ‘E’ is for ‘Evolve’. By ‘Evolve’ I mean that leaders, who engage others, have found what they love doing, what makes their eyes dance, and they are doing it – and excelling at it. One of the best, best, best TED talks I have watched in the last twelve months is by Larry Smith, a Professor of Economics, University of Waterloo in Canada. It’s a funny, but very blunt, talk that will make you stop and think – if you’ve not already done so given the title above. His unique delivery style is thought-provoking, funny, and devastatingly honest and it’s a video that we all should watch and re-watch. Smith states that most of us will fail to have a great career and espouses the reasons why:

1. Some of us start out with the aspiration for a good career and some of us start out with the aspiration for a great career. However, most of us will fail at both.
2. We have been told many, many times that we should pursue our passion, but choose to ignore this advice and decide not to pursue it.
3. Some of us are simply too lazy and won’t try hard enough. If we try to look for our passion, but can't find it, then we make excuses not to do what we need for a really great career.
4. We create excuses that we believe, such as really great careers are truly a matter of luck for most people. 
5. We choose to believe that there are special people who pursue their passions but they are geniuses. Smith suggests that we all used to think we were geniuses – but probably only when we were young. As we grow up we lose this belief and think instead that we are ‘completely competent’. Smith believes that such thoughts damn us all with the faintest of praise. And he’s right.
6. We believe that if we pursue a great career then we have to be weird. People who pursue their passions are strange or odd. We don’t like to think of ourselves as strange or odd. We like to think of ourselves as nice, normal people. However, nice normal people don’t have passion.
7. We do what our parents tell us – and that is to work really, really hard. Smith believes that we can work really, really hard – but that’s not the same as having a really great career. He also believes that just telling kids to work really hard is nonsense. Why? Because all of the evidence points to the contrary.
8. We find things that we’re interested in but we don’t find our passion. Smith says that having an interest is great – but what about finding our passion in the big wide world and trying a bit harder? We’re not interested. Passion isn’t the same as interest and we might have lots of interests but all of us need to find our passion.
9. Even if we find our passion many of us will still fail according to Smith. Why? Because we continue to invent excuses for not having a great career as our passion. The phrase “if only I had…” is, according to Smith, one of the most damning things we can say.
10. Smith says that what we say to ourselves is that human relationships are more important than accomplishments. We want to be a great friend, a great parent, a great spouse etc. and we won’t sacrifice that at the altar of human accomplishment. Smith is uncomfortably honest here. If we listen to what we’re saying to ourselves; we’re making ourselves out to be a hero. But we’re not heroes.
11. Then when our children say that they want to be something other than that which they are good at, we repeat the mantra. We repeat what our parents told us and what we have told ourselves in terms of excuses.
12. The bottom line is that many of us are simply afraid. We’re afraid to try, afraid to fail, afraid to succeed.

Thinking like a Leader

I’ve been working with a number of executives and leadership teams this month who are trying to solve problems. How do they drive greater engagement amongst their people? How do they open up opportunities within large accounts? How do they move away from the challenge of just lowering price when trying to sell their services? How do they improve the quality of their offering? The list of problems and challenges goes on and on. One of my clients is a global car manufacturer and whilst talking with a senior leader and his team after their business had been surveyed on their levels of engagement within the business, what I noticed was that the leader had an answer for everything. Whatever question was posed, whatever challenge was offered, the leader had an answer. He ‘just knew’.

Being a leader means being able to engage, ignite and delight our talent to deliver results for us and to do so amidst complexity, change and ambiguity. What I have re-read recently is the superb ‘How To Think Like A Freak’ from the ‘Freakonomics’ authors Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner and I am reminded of its brilliance. Why is it brilliant? Because what is outlines is so effective. Thinking differently, thinking effectively requires an approach which, at its core, offers strategies that we can all use. One of the most simple and powerful strategies is simply being comfortable to say ‘I don’t know’. One of the things that I am continually struck by, as an Executive Coach, is how rarely this is said in business. Somehow, somewhere there is a belief that says the more senior we become, the more we need to know everything – or at least to know a lot. However, in the context of ‘deliberating’ as one of the hallmarks of Executive Presence, being unwilling to say ‘I don’t know’ impacts our ability to think effectively and that in turns impacts our ability to do the right things (as opposed to being busy just doing things), communicate the right messages and engage our people in the most effective way.

It’s not an interview or a court of law, it’s a problem with a number of different facets that we need to understand, so let’s just stop with the thinking that says we ‘just know’ a lot and get focused on being comfortable with not knowing.

Engaging as a Leader

The speed, shape and size of change in business today means that how organisations survive and thrive requires a completely different set of rules. If economists are to be believed, we are (slowly) emerging from the sharpest economic downturn since the Second World War, however, employees are less engaged; competitive pressure is intense and budgets remain tight. So against that backdrop, how do leaders engage, ignite and drive their talent to consistently achieve, exceed, transform and excel? I see amongst my clients some common themes. Namely:

• A relentless scrutiny of what is working well. It’s all too easy to focus on what’s failing. Problem solving makes sense when everything else is nearly flawless. However, it fails in times of change and when we have a range of challenges or problems across the board. Who’s still succeeding? Who continually exceeds expectations, despite facing the same issues as everyone else? How they do it? And what they do? These questions are all pursued with unending curiosity so that success can be replicated, magnified and extended across the business to where performance is lower.
• Modelling the right mindset. As leaders, if we operate from a mindset of scarcity, in other words, we believe that resources are limited (which at one level is true with budget cuts etc.), it quickly engenders a bunker mentality. In addition, we fall back on a reliance on winning by purely cutting our prices plus negativity, defeatism and a lack of energy and pace all become the norm.
• If, however, leaders operate from a mindset of abundance, then things appear very different. An abundance mentality is simply choosing to believe that we have available whatever we need to succeed; and our challenge is to work out how to get what we need, then the results can be transformative. 

This isn’t ‘woo woo’ thinking based on a simplistic ‘positive mental attitude’. It is the behaviour of leaders who continually engage, motivate and drive their talent to succeed.

It also works for entrepreneurs too. On May 9th, I celebrated 10 years of running my own business and from personal experience – and without the protection of a large corporate behind me, I can honestly say that the approaches I’ve described simply work. Fact.

Here’s to the next ten years…….

Cleavage and Credibility

I find myself exercised by the topic of bosoms this month.

On 18th March the Right Honourable George Osborne MP, the Chancellor of the Exchequer, stood up in the House of Commons to give his final, valedictory budget speech before the United Kingdom goes to the polls to vote in early May. This event is a very important date in the calendar for politicians of all political persuasion and Osborne was on his feet for more than an hour. During that time, his speech was streamed live on the internet and across TV and radio news channels. Sat behind him, and clearly in view throughout the whole session, was the most powerful female politician in the UK – the Home Secretary, the Right Honourable Theresa May, MP. May is responsible for keeping our country safe and secure, so to say that she has a very important job would be something of an understatement.

Back to Osborne’s speech. So, as the cameras rolled and the policies and political rhetoric unfolded, what exercised most comment? Well, apart from Osborne’s choice of suit (that’s for another newsletter), it was what Theresa May was wearing (or rather what she wasn’t wearing), that attracted the most attention. Her neckline prompted debate far and wide because what was on show was her cleavage. Endless amusing, irritating and on occasion downright offensive commentary was made about a woman who holds a serious position of authority, responsibility and stature. All because we could see some of her ‘girls’. See the review here.

In Australia, Channel Ten host Natarsha Belling became an unsuspecting internet sensation after her ‘phallic shaped’ neckline caused a social media storm. Of course she didn’t mean to do it. The image attracted more than 110,000 ‘likes’ and was shared more than 7,000 times. The point about this was summed up perfectly by the line from one wag “once you’ve seen it; you can’t un-see it”. Here’s just one article.

As professionals and as leaders, our visual signature matters - whether we like it or not. Whenever we look at others, the eye is searching for contrast; for difference; we are ‘drawn’ to a focal point and we will always look at skin. I think Belling literally didn’t ‘see’ the visual she had created through high contrast. Unfortunately 110,000 other people, who could be bothered to re–tweet it, could. As for May, the focal point she chose was so at odds with the occasion, the mood and the relevance to her role. Cleavage conveys vulnerability, femininity, softness, allure, sexiness. All of which is fantastic – just not for business (unless your business is the oldest one in the world).

When you get your choice of clothing right, we notice you. When you get it wrong, we notice what you’re wearing.

International Women's Day - March 8

In honour of this auspicious occasion, my blog this month is dedicated to 20 facts about women.

1. The word “woman” is believed to have derived from the Middle English term “wyfman”, broken down simply as the wife (wyf) of man. In Old English, women were described simply as wyf, while the term “man” was used to describe a human person, regardless of gender. 
2. The English word “girl” was initially used to describe a young person of either sex. It was not until the beginning of the sixteenth century that the term was used specifically to describe a female child.
3. The biological sign for the female sex, a circle placed on top of a small cross, is also the symbol for the planet Venus. The symbol is believed to be a stylized representation of the Roman goddess Venus’ hand mirror.
4. While many stars and moons are christened with female names, Venus is the only planet in our solar system given the name of a female goddess.
5. The English language originally delineated between women in different stages of life with the terms “maiden”, “mother”, and “crone”. A maiden referred to a young girl who was unmarried, a mother referred to a woman in her child-bearing years, and a crone described a post-menopausal woman. (I’m quite sensitive to this terminology – please note.)
6. The average height of a woman in the U.S. is approximately 5 feet 4 inches, and the average weight is about 163 pounds. These figures vary greatly throughout the world, due to differences in nutrition and prenatal care.
7. In almost every country worldwide, the life expectancy for women is higher than for men.
8. While the population of males is slightly greater than females worldwide (98.6 women for every 100 men), there are roughly four million more women than men in the U.S. 
9. Worldwide, women are nearly twice as likely to be blind or visually impaired as men. Experts attribute this difference to the greater longevity of women (leading to more age-related visual impairment) and specific eye diseases that are intrinsically more common in women such as dry eye syndrome and Fuch’s Dystrophy (yes, that’s a real condition).
10. Depression is the most common cause of disability in women, and approximately 25% of all women will experience severe depression at some point in their lives.
11. Approximately one in five women worldwide reports being sexually abused before the age of 15.
12. About 14 million adolescent girls become pregnant each year, with over 90% of those girls living in developing countries.
13. Each day 1,600 women die as result of pregnancy or childbirth complications. Nearly 99% of these deaths occur in developing nations.
14. The probability of a woman giving birth to a baby girl instead of a baby boy increases significantly the nearer the mother lives to the equator. While the cause of this gender selection is unknown, scientists believe the constant sunlight hours and abundant food supply in tropical regions may favor female births.
15. International Women’s Day is held each year on March 8. The annual event was first observed worldwide in 1909.
16. The first country to grant women the right to vote in the modern era was New Zealand in 1893.
17. The first woman to rule a country as an elected leader in the modern era was Sirimavo Bandaranaike of Sri Lanka, who was elected as prime minister of the island nation in 1960 and later re-elected in 1970.
18. According to an ancient Sumerian legend, the universe was created by a female, the goddess Tiamat. This role of a female creator is not unique, as the Australian Aboriginal creation myth also credits the creation of life to a woman.
19. The earliest recorded female physician was Merit Ptah, a doctor in ancient Egypt who lived around 2700 B.C. Many historians believe she is the first woman recorded by name in the history of all of the sciences.
20. The world’s first novel, The Tale of Genji, was published in Japan around A.D. 1000 by female author Murasaki Shikibu.

Breaking the Boardroom

I have had the privilege this month of being involved in a report which Telefonica created in co-partnership with the Chartered Institute of Personnel & Development (CIPD), on the topic of women on boards. In the UK, Lord Davies published a Women on Boards Report in 2011 and challenged UK FTSE businesses to have a female component of at least 25%. Whilst we’ve made a lot of progress; figures suggest that we still have a way to go and will not hit the target date set by Lord Davies. The research with which I have been involved is entitled ‘Breaking the Boardroom’ http://bit.ly/1umqpux and it suggests that 45% of women believe that women still aren’t occupying enough senior positions.

Yet again, the debate continues regarding why? Many different reasons surround this discussion and I am drawn back to the topic of confidence. To be clear, I’m not suggesting that as long as you feel confident then you’ll be fine; I’m just saying that there are so many extraordinary, bright, talented women with whom I’ve had the pleasure of working who suffer from lack of confidence on occasion. I think it’s a piece in the puzzle.

What’s this based on? Well, a monthly newsletter won’t do it justice but some fantastic research a few years ago talked about how women are always doing one of the 4 Ps – Pleasing, Proving, Performing, Perfecting. Like monkeys on our back or chains around our neck, as women we please, we prove, we perform and we perfect…and by so doing, have more than enough material from which to create doubt, confusion and chaos in our minds regarding our own worth and ability. If you’re a women reading this - which ones do you own? If you’re a man reading this and thinking "What? I don’t get that?” then terrific, that’s also what the research shows. Women spend a great deal more time focusing on their perceived gaps and flaws, than celebrating and developing their inherent strengths. Much more so than men. By the way; this isn’t an ‘anti–man’ vibe this month either. I celebrate, appreciate and applaud professional men for their talent and skills...it’s just a fact that they don’t always suffer from lack of confidence in the same way that women do.

Confidence is an essential facet of leaders who have Executive Presence, and my own research a couple of years ago proved that those with Executive Presence are aware of their strengths as well as their flaws and continue to work on both.

Whether you’re a woman reading this, or a man who works with professional women, check out the research at http://bit.ly/1umqpux, #breakingtheboardroom.

New Year, New Plans, New Goals

Happy New Year!

With the festive season well and truly behind us, now is the time for looking to the year ahead and making plans. 

What do you want to achieve? What projects do you want to deliver? What will success look like for you in 2015?

As a professional Executive Coach, although asking people about their goals is an everyday occurrence in my world, I am continually struck by how rarely I hear clear, well thought through goals by way of an answer.

The responses received tend to be historical; in other words I often get the back-story or history rather than the vision or desired future. I tend to hear a lot of detail; a lot of waffle; a lot of "blah, blah, blah" and it's got me wondering why….

The pace of business today seems to have pushed our behaviour to value being busy. Getting things done, reducing that inbox and being a keyboard warrior are threatening to be more important that being a crisp, clear thinker. The clarity of our thinking is betrayed in the calibre of our communication. We simply don’t spend enough time considering what exactly we’re trying to achieve before diving right in and getting busy. That translates verbally and we start talking too soon, saying too much, conveying very little. There’s not enough pausing, considering, surmising.

Setting clear goals is nothing new. Stephen Covey in his Seven Habits book talks about the importance of starting with the end in mind. I suspect there are very few professional people in the world who haven’t heard of the acronym SMART for setting objectives. Sharing that model with clients is not a "dear diary” moment. And yet in practical terms it’s really not that easy. We need to get super specific; we need to know how we’ll gauge success, we need to agree with others on the outcomes, we need to ensure relevancy and then we need to commit to a date to complete them by - and stick to it. There’s not enough envisioning, refining, prioritising.

So, a new year means new plans and that means new goals.

I’m now going to check on my mine……